TW: Intimate Partner Violence

My husband would choke me and pull my hair during sex. I’ve told him repeatedly that I don’t like it. He’s also tried to suffocate me during sex. I began to get scared of his touch. If I complained about this “rough sex” he would give me the silent treatment for the next day or gaslight me and deny he was hurting me.

What scared me the most was that when he hurt me, he was very excited. His breathing was more ragged and he looked angry as he choked me or covered my mouth and nose. I wish I had the strength to call 911, but I made excuses. He didn’t mean it. It’s the pandemic.

Then, his coercive anger increased at home, in the car, and in public. He’d go from charming, annoyed, to explosive anger quickly. I lived in fear...if our takeout was taking to long, he’d be pissed. And, when he’s mad—it’s frightening.

Finally, I kicked him out.

He is now living with his parents and I finally feel safe. I’m telling friends that I lost 250 lbs.